Cranky
Nick has been going through a bit of a tough time lately and I’m wondering if it’s his meds or hormones. Once a long time ago a higher dose of his medication (Luvox) proved to be too much for him and the side effects were extreme OCD, (he kept talking to himself, saying the same words over and over again) which took a couple of days to wean off. But lately he’s been a lot more irritable and behavioral than usual (frankly he’s never been this cranky before) biting his hand (which was amazing to see because I’ve only seen Meghan do that) and throwing small items around—like a magnet from the refrigerator—nothing significant. But these little tantrums are significant because they seem to really bother him—and me too. I heard him in the bathroom the other night struggling with himself; talking to himself about feeling angry, with bits of rage showing through. Today, his last day of school, he came home in a “cranky” mood (that’s what he’s calling it) and kept asking me why he was so cranky and got all mad because it’s his last day of school and he’s supposed to be happy, so why was he cranky? And all I could do was reassure him that everyone in his age group gets cranky once in a while, it’s natural (being very careful about the words used because he doesn’t like to be called a teenager or getting older or getting bigger… ugh!). I was honest though and told him it could be hormones or his medication, but it didn’t seem to help much. Actually the worst part about his cranky behavior is the very irrational conversations we can have… It’s sort of like circling around the same problem over and over again and never getting anywhere, like spinning around a rotary going 100 miles an hour… around and around and around….
Nick: yelling and banging the table and the wall “Why am I cranky?”
Me: calm “I don’t know.”
Nick: “What do you mean you don’t know?”
Me: “I can’t know everything, Nick.”
Nick: More kicking going on.
Me: “Don’t kick that!”
Nick: “I didn’t kick anything!”
Me: “Yes you did.”
Nick: “Did you see me kick that?”
Me: “Yeah”
Nick: “Ughhhh!!” More hand biting. “What do you mean you saw me kick that, I didn’t do it!”
Me: Do you think you could get the mail for me, your MAD magazine (which he loves) might be in there today (using distraction as a strategy and getting a MAD magazine in the mail was a long shot. I knew that!).
Nick: “Ughhhhh!” (more hand biting) “Why am I CRANKY? It’s my last day of school I don’t know why I’m CRANKY.” (fist punches in the air)
Me: “No one likes being cranky it just happens sometimes. It’s okay.” (but actually thinking that it could be his meds or that he has another disorder…)
Nick: More hand biting and banging walls… (I guess “it’s okay” was another trigger word) “What do you mean it’s okay? It’s not okay! That doesn’t make sense.” Looking at me with his hands held out and getting angrier, “why are you making me cranky??”
Me: Collapsing in a chair ready to surrender…“Beam me up Scotty!”
Nick: straight-faced, not quite sure what that meant but was thinking about it, as if he’s Heard. That. Somewhere. Before??? A mere distraction on my part but while he was thinking, more hand biting and banging was going on. “Why am I CRANKY!!”
More banging … banging the table, banging the wall, scaring the cat (poor Coco)
Me: “STOP!”
Nick: “What? I’m not banging around, why do you think I’m banging around…?”
I could go on and on for the whole hour or so that this was going on, but since I like you, I will spare you all the ugly details. Just know that he seemed to have struggled quite a bit wondering why he was so cranky and not wanting to take responsibility for his actions… as if he was ashamed. Meanwhile, I will put a call in to the doctor, you know the shrink that controls his meds… and see what he has to say (if anything), but perhaps this is one for the neurologist? And during what seemed to be a lapse in his temper, I asked him, once again, to get the mail by using the most “happy to be alive and living here” cheerleader-like tone (still waiting for Scotty), so he did, and when he came back, a MAD magazine was sitting on top. Now isn’t that a gift?!
cms8741 says:
June 11th, 2010 at
Um…thanks (??) for giving me a glimpse into my own future. E-Niner says something similar now, though he is “angry” and not “cranky.” Though, I would have to say that both of these are equally bad!!!
When E-Niner was hospitalized, they told us that lots of kids are hospitalized at his age because of significant hormone changes and again when they are teenagers because of hormones. So perhaps you are on track with your presumption.
I hope you can get the meds in order…otherwise my guess is you’ll have more than one cranky person in the house!
Rachel Cohen-Rottenberg says:
June 12th, 2010 at
Why is he so cranky on his last day of school? Change. Transition. Going from lots of structure to none. Going from the familiar to the unfamiliar. Lots of autistic people hate change. I do. Even when the change is good, I get very agitated.
Plus, there are those hormones. They make *NT* kids crazy. Consider their impact on Nick’s sensitive neurology, and there’s another possible factor.
And definitely, do some research on the meds he’s taking and see whether his symptoms fit any known side-effects. (I don’t mean just checking manufacturer’s web sites; I mean googling for information from people whose kids actually take the stuff, because the manufacturers often don’t tell you the story in words that paint the most vivid or accurate picture.) I don’t know whether Nick is on any short-half-life meds, but if he is, and he’s taking them once a day, or too far apart during the day, he might be going through interdose withdrawals, which would have a destabilizing effect. (I speak from very hard experience here.) If he is on any prescribed medication like benzodiazepines or Z drugs, he might be developing a tolerance to them, which would tend to magnify anxiety. If he is on anything like that and you want him off it at any point, it has to happen very, very slowly or the results can be devastating. (I speak from very hard experience here, too. I’m going through a benzo taper after attempting a cold turkey withdrawal and, well, I won’t ever try THAT again.)
If you want to chat, feel free to email me. I’ve learned more about prescription meds lately than any doctor ever bothered to share with me. I’d be happy to try and point you toward some resources and information.
Holly says:
June 13th, 2010 at
Thanks guys for your input. I really appreciate your help and knowledge. Rachel, you might have a good point about changes in his routine, even though he has been awaiting this all year—the end of school and summer! His meds are a bit difficult to resolve. He’s been on these meds for over 4 years, and at the same dose, so it’s interesting. A year ago we tried to increase the dosage but it was too much for him, so we remain where we are. Only recently has he been experiencing these temper rages so I’m thinking hormones but… ugh! I will be sure to email you for advice as we go along. Thanks for the offer and for being a good friend.
Take care!
Tanya @ TeenAutism says:
June 13th, 2010 at
Yes, I was also thinking it may be the hormones – Nigel has also been really irritable and disagreeable lately. Ugh!
Rachel Cohen-Rottenberg says:
June 15th, 2010 at
Interesting about Nick’s meds. I wonder if he is developing a tolerance to any of them, and whether they’re therefore becoming less effective. In any case, email me any time you want to chat.
Shelley Dillon says:
June 17th, 2010 at
You tell him that I am cranky too. I hate the end of school. It is always so busy those last couple of weeks, the kids are cranked, the teachers are trying to squeeze the last bit in, there are too many parties and end of year things to do. It’s exhausting.
So, over here, Shea gets sick and I can barely get Molly out of bed.
The end of the school year sucks.
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July 20th, 2010 at
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